Wine is great. But, if you need more convincing than that, here are 11 reasons why wine drunk is better than any other kind of drunk. You’re welcome.
1. If you have a cellar or basement full of vodka, chances are you will be called an alcoholic.
If you have a cellar or basement full of wine, you will be called classy and your sophistication will be admired by your friends.
2. Jesus didn’t turn water into bourbon, or even coffee (which still would have been awesome, although not so miraculous – even I can do that!). He turned it into wine. Who am I to question Jesus? Seems like he knew how to party!
3. You can easily get away with having a couple of glasses of wine at a Friday work lunch. Your co-workers will be impressed with your suave drink choice. The same can’t be said for having a couple of Malibu and pineapple juices, as much as you may want to.
4. Your parents won’t look down on you for getting a happy little buzz on at your next family event. You can give the impression you are a worldly adult while you discuss important political and ethical issues with your Aunts and Uncles, all the while getting sneaky top-ups so you never see the bottom of your glass.
5. The same wine can taste completely different if cellared for a few years! It does have to be the right wine though. That bottle of Passion Pop you “cellared” for 5 years after high school, is still going to taste as terrible as it did when you first drank it.
6. Beer drunk can make you bloated. Tequila drunk can make you crazy. Rum drunk can make you angry.
Wine drunk makes you wise. I think some of my best ideas and team brainstorming sessions have happened when I have been wine drunk. Somewhere between the first and second bottle lies all of the world’s wisdom. The only problem is, you usually forget that wisdom if you don’t write it down before finishing the second bottle.
7. Studies show there are some great health benefits to drinking a glass of red wine per night. Although, these studies make it clear that they mean one glass. If Betty White can do it, then so can I.
8. Price isn’t everything. Sure you would expect an $80 bottle of Champagne to taste pretty damn fantastic, but you can also get some great wines at more reasonable prices.
9. Not that we really need an excuse, but drinking wine is the perfect reason to eat cheese!
10. A glass of wine can definitely relax you and help you sleep. And sometimes you just need a nap. Like this munchkin here.
11. The best part about drinking wine is that you don’t have to get drunk to enjoy it. You can just enjoy it. (I bet my mum is so proud of how mature that statement is!)
I don’t believe for a second that anyone actually enjoys drinking straight vodka. If you say you do, you are either a dirty liar, or you have never tried wine.
So go and pour yourself a glass of wine, and do some brainstorming for more reasons why wine drunk is the best drunk. Remember, the best ones will come to you in that magic moment between bottles one and two.
If you have any reasons we have missed, feel free to add them in the comments below and we will post a Part 2 version!